DOOMSDAY IS UPON US

True believers; the end is near. On Friday night, civilization as we know it will cease to exist. Society will drop to its knees and beg for forgiveness from the Mayan overlords, only to find that they’re indifferent and unwavering from their cataclysmic prophecy when they strike down upon the planet with the sort of fury previously reserved for Michael Bay’s masturbation sessions.

I don’t know about you, but that seems like the cause for celebration. Fortunately, we live in New York, so there’s plenty of celebration to go around this Friday night as we await our impending doom in a drunken and/or drug-adled stupor. We’ve got a comprehensive list of doomsday shows for you for the evening as you would expect; and here’s a few recommendations based on how you’ve chosen to deal with the end of the world:

For The Blissfully Ignorant
The Sufjan Stevens Christmas Sing-A-Long at Bowery Ballroom

For The Realist
Official World’s End at Shea Stadium with Guardian Alien, Muck, TONSTARTS SBANDHT, Kria Brekkan, Video Program, Jazz Massagers, Ashcan Orchestra, Dada Trash College

For Those Who Have Chosen To Go On A Bender
Fucked Up and Parquet Courts at The Warsaw

For Those Who Want To Go Down Grinding All Over Hot Chicks
The Apocalypse Party with Joakim and Jacques Renault at Cameo Gallery

For The Mystics Looking Forward To A New World Order
Prince Rama, DicPic (Pictureplane and DJ Dog Dick) at 285 Kent

For The Lame Stoner Girl Who Lived On Your Floor Freshman Year (NEVER CHANGE!)
Dave Matthews at Barclays Center